Grace, in its truest form, is one of the most powerful forces in our lives. It is the unmerited, undeserved, and unearned favor of God. It’s the kind of love that sees beyond our flaws, forgives our mistakes, and blesses us without condition. It’s not just a gift; it’s a call to live differently—one that challenges us to not only receive grace, but to extend it to others.
At the heart of grace lies the sacrifice of Jesus on the cross. He bore unimaginable pain and suffering so that we could be saved, forgiven, and renewed. This act of love is the most selfless in the history of humanity, and yet, it brings us the most precious gift we can ever receive: forgiveness. Jesus’ grace covers everything we’ve done and everything we will do—provided we simply believe in Him. And then, He asks us to follow His example. To love and forgive others, as He has done for us.
But here’s the challenge—how many times in our daily lives do we forget to extend grace? How many times have we found ourselves frustrated, hurt, or angry at our spouse for something they did (or didn’t do)? And how often do we hold onto those frustrations, letting small unmet expectations create unnecessary tension? It’s so easy to get caught up in the little things—the way the dishes are loaded, the milk being used without being replaced, or the way our spouse doesn’t always do things “our way.” These everyday irritations can slowly build resentment, distance, and bitterness in our marriages.
“who saved us and called us to a holy calling, not because of our works but because of his own purpose and grace, which he gave us in Christ Jesus before the ages began,” – 2 Timothy 1:9
Jason and I have walked through many challenges in our marriage. It’s interesting how, despite the love and commitment we share, stress and difficulty can slowly chip away at the unity we’ve built. The chaos of life, the daily pressures, can sometimes make us forget the very things that brought us together in the first place. Our marriage should be a source of strength, a safe haven from the struggles we face in the world, but it’s often under attack. The enemy knows that if he can destabilize marriages, he can cause a ripple effect of destruction. And he doesn’t need to create huge problems—sometimes, the smallest frustrations, left unchecked, can lead to bigger issues.
But what if we could turn that around? What if, every day, we took a moment to pause and reflect on the blessings our spouse brings to our lives? What if we chose to focus on their good qualities, instead of our frustrations? What if we thanked them for sharing in the work, instead of complaining about how the dishes are done?
Psalm 103:8 reminds us that “The Lord is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, and abounding in love.” If God, in His perfection, can extend that kind of grace to us, surely we can do the same for the person we’ve chosen to spend our lives with. We didn’t marry them for their perfection—we married them because we saw something in them worth committing to, something that was bigger than the petty frustrations. So, why not focus on those things? Why not be quick to forgive and slow to anger, just as Jesus has shown us?
In 2 Timothy 1:9, Paul writes, “He has saved us and called us to a holy life—not because of anything we have done, but because of His own purpose and grace.” God’s grace is not based on what we’ve done or deserve; it’s given to us freely. In the same way, our love and grace toward our spouse should not be based on their actions or our expectations, but on the love and grace we’ve received from God.
It’s easy to let the challenges of life cloud our relationships. It’s easy to let anger, bitterness, or unmet expectations fester, especially in our marriages, which are under constant pressure from the world. But when we stop and remember the grace we’ve been given, it becomes easier to forgive, to love, and to extend that grace to others. Our marriages are a reflection of the grace we’ve received, and they are one of the most precious gifts we have. We can make a choice each day to look for the good, to choose gratitude, and to follow God’s example in how we treat our spouses.
Every day is an opportunity to refocus. Every day is a chance to love better, to forgive quicker, and to live out the grace that God has so abundantly given to us. For me, there is no one else I would rather walk through life with than my husband, Jason. Every day, I want to choose grace. I want to choose forgiveness, even in the smallest moments, and commit to living out the love and grace God has shown me.
So let’s make war with the enemy. Let’s refuse to let frustration and anger dictate our relationships. Instead, let’s choose grace, let’s choose love, and let’s choose to build stronger marriages that reflect the heart of God. Because when we do, we not only experience the joy of grace, but we also extend it to others, showing the world a little bit of the love and mercy God has shown to us.